𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘛𝘰 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘈𝘯𝘹𝘪𝘦𝘵𝘺 𝘋𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘛𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘖𝘧 𝘜𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘺

self care Nov 14, 2020
 

If you are feeling anxious right now you are not alone.

In light of everything that is happening in the world right now I  thought it may be helpful to use these tips to stay grounded and release some of that anxiety and fear.

This is an unprecedented time where all of us are in this together, the entire planet!  We are all home (unless you are an essential worker...Thank you) and many of us with small children who now we have to be the parent, the teacher and the full time chef for and it can feel overwhelming.

I know for me there are days that I just want to give up and let them watch 12 hours of tv  but the reality is we must stay mindful and calm for our children, our families and our community. 

During these last several months my daily spiritual practice has been the only thing that has helped me through this and I wanted to share with you what I am doing to keep myself positive and productive in my business, with my kids and truthfully for my own mental health. 

As and entrepreneur and a mom I must protect my own energy and well being so I can show up for others. 

These tools I am giving you are things that you can use for the rest of your life to move through future difficult times and to practice living in alignment with your desires. 

You have a choice you can live in fight or flight mode (fear) or you can choose to see this time as a rebirth of who you truly are. 

 Here are 10 tools you can use to stay calm and productive during this down time. 

1. Breathe

One of the best things that you can do right now is to breathe! I know it sounds simple and you are saying well yeah I have to breathe to stay alive but I mean really focus on your breath. When you feel the anxiety creep in and your heart is starting to race just stop...and breathe. Sit down for 2 minutes and take deep breaths in through your nose for 4 seconds and let it out through you mouth for 7 seconds focusing on filling up your lungs and releasing all that energy back into the air. It's as if you are letting go of that stress as you exhale. Release back to the earth. Even letting out a noise on the out breath may feel good.

There are apps you can download to remind you to breathe as well, that's how important it is. So first just breathe... it will calm your nervous system and get you out of the fight or flight mode. 

2. Be Conscious Of Your Internal Dialogue 

 Remember what we focus on expands. We attract that which we give our energy or our thoughts to so it's important during this time to be mindful of what we focus on. This is a time of uncertainty and fear for so many people but we have a choice every second of the day to change our thoughts and not to down spiral into anger, fear, depression or anxiety. We have a choice to identify our feelings, acknowledge them and then release them to a more positive thought...Gabby Berstein calls this The Choose Again Method. It is healthy and healing to get anger, to cry to feel like a victim but then we need to move through that and see the new possibilities in our situation. In the moment that the fear or anxiety arises you can choose to forgive that thought and reframe it to something positive.

This is the time to focus on what you DO want after this pandemic is over. If you are going to spend time projecting into the future use that time to think of all of the things that you want to create in the world. Reframe your thoughts to this is happening FOR YOU not TO YOU. Write down all the ways this new way of life is actually benefiting you and stay in gratitude for that. The mind is powerful so make sure you are conscious of your thoughts. 

(Turn off the news if it is causing you anxiety as well)

3. Self Care

This is one that I think we forget about especially as moms, but it the one that can be the most important for your own mental health. I was asked this morning by mom if I was doing any little things throughout the day to uplift my spirits and I honestly really had to think about it. I am a single mom with a 5 and 7 year old so self are is not at the top of my mind always. Don't over complicate this one.

Self care is what feels good for you. How can you take a break throughout the day and just breathe and recharge yourself? Maybe that is a bath, or a long walk outside or a hike, yes you can go outside during this stay home order, in fact it's probably one of the best thing you can do for yourself right now. Get out into nature. (just practice social distancing) Meditation is another way get grounded. Maybe for you its getting up and taking a shower getting out of your pj clothes and doing your makeup, or your hair. Maybe painting your nails since all the nail salons are closed.  Order take out- I know for me I have been cooking a lot more than usual. Cooking is actually part of my self care. It calms me and puts my focus onto something that serves my family. Set boundaries with your children and let them know that for the next 30 minutes they cannot disturb you. I do this all the time with my boys and it helps me to just come back into my body and refill my own cup.

Do things that bring you JOY! Have a dance party, watch a funny movie so you can have a good laugh, sing, exercise. Give yourself permission to do what makes you feel good and gives you a moment to recharge.  

4. Have A Compassionate Heart

There is so much noise out there right now with media, social media and our own families. There are different theories about what is happening and people have different thoughts on every issue. This is our our human right to have different opinions and different feelings about how the world looks. This is our own truth! But as allies and as a collective we must develop a compassionate heart during this pandemic, and in life.

I have talked about how since this whole Covid 19 talk started I haven't had much fear and in fact feel completely calm and at peace in my body, mind and spirit. I am actually enjoying being home with my kids and I can clearly see how the planet as a collective consciousness are being shown a new way of life which will benefit us all. BUT...I also recognize that the majority of people don't feel this way and that there are parents that are loosing their mind with kids being home and people are legitimately scared out of their mind. I recognize that their are people losing loved ones, people sick and people loosing their businesses and jobs. I recognize that this is a real global crisis and that I need to stay at home to save lives and listen to what is best for my community but I have a choice to not to live in fear and anxiety and that is my truth. I honor your truth and support you in that and have compassion for the real things that you are feeling.

We are all in this together and we must link arms across the globe with an open and loving heart, put our differences aside and just show up in love! 

5. Read

I have been wanting to read more and always feel like I don't have time or I end up watching a movie instead but what I have found during this social isolation is that I am craving books and to get lost in a story. Find a book that is steeped in mystery or fantasy, maybe a romance novel or a simple but fun novel. I don't know about you, but I have shelves full of "self help" or books by spiritual authors that I want to learn from so that is an option too.

Allow yourself to get taken away from the chaos that is happening outside and just be. Reading is so therapeutic for me and it gives me something to look forward to before bed or while the kids play. I know the library is closed right now but you have options. You can either buy a book from Amazon and have it shipped or you can go to free apps like Libby or Hoopla and download free audio and digital books. These are linked to your library card and you borrow books like you would at the library. Also Audible is great for audio books, I often put a ear bud in and walk around the house listening to a novel. If you have kids Audible Kids books are free right now also. There are so many options out there and most businesses are giving free 30 day offers or reduced prices if you wanted to pay for a service. Happy reading. ~Book Recommendations for the Soulciete Book Club

6. Meditate

Yes Yes Yes! If you have been thinking about adding meditation into your life this is the time. Meditation allows you to be still and turn off the chatter in your brain (this may take some time to train yourself to turn off the noise) and just listen.

The difference between prayer and meditation is that prayer you are talking to God (Universe, Spirit, Source) and Meditation is when you are still and listen to God.

You can meditate anywhere and for any amount of time, there is no set rules around how you meditate. It gives you a moment to be quiet and observe  your thoughts, listen to what the Universe is guiding you to do. Meditation helps with many of the things we talked about above like being mindful of your breathe, acknowledging your thoughts, allowing yourself to just be still and listen, reduces anxiety and stress, enhances self awareness, helps with sleep, gets you back into your body and into alignment with your desires and overall can help to make you a more kind and compassionate person which ripples out into the world. 

I like to meditate in the morning before the boys get up because that is when the world is still so quiet and still. It allows me to set myself up for a successful day and be more present and joyful with the kids first thing. It also helps me to set my my intentions for the day. I may journal before and set my intentions and then go into deep meditation around my desires and visualize how that will actualize in my day/life. 

There are many different ways to meditate like guided or silent but you will have to find what works for you. There are many apps on your phone that help you and guide you through meditations. Examples like Headspace, Calm, Deepak Chopra, Ananda,  Insight Timer and so many others. 

Start with 5 minutes and go from there. 

7. Journal

Raise your hand if you have had a beautiful journal in your night stand for years and you had the best intentions to use it but it is just collecting dust in the drawer. 

I can so relate. Every year I would buy a new beautiful journal and say "this is the year" I am going to journal every night and get my thoughts on paper... and then in July I would realize I haven't even opened it. 

Well guess what this is such a perfect time for this. This is a time in history like we have never seen before and it would be so nice to record all that is happening with you while in quarantine and the crazy things you are doing to stay sane. You have time now!! Slow down and give yourself the gift of releasing your thoughts and emotions onto paper. 

Journaling helps with anxiety, boosts your mood, allows you to release emotions and evokes tears which is so healthy in times like this, it increases your self awareness, helps with communication, memory, and healing by becoming more aware of what is happening at a subconscious level.

It also helps us who may be entrepreneurs to get our ideas onto paper, helps with creativity (you can draw too), self discipline, setting goals and writing down your dreams and desires in life. 

Allow yourself to just write with no judgement and no fear of doing it right or wrong. Just allow it to flow. I have heard that a great way of doing this is to not pick up your pen for a certain amount of time and just keep writing no matter how ridiculous it may seem. 

I always like to start with my gratitude for the day and go from there. Journaling is a powerful tool to help you move through hard times and also relish in the happy times. 

Treat yourself and buy a journal that you love and that inspires you to come back to it daily to write. 

8. Nourish Your Body

This seems pretty straight forward but so many of us have used this time to comfort our self with foods that are unhealthy and have caused weight gain. It's more important now than ever to nourish your body with healthy foods and nutrients. When we eat healthy food and use it as fuel instead of comfort we feel more energized, focused and grounded. Make a grocery list of healthy meals before entering the store so you know exactly what you need instead of just throwing anything into the basket. Also try not to go to the story hungry. Also limit alcohol intake. 

This also includes exercise. Move your body everyday for at least 30 min and this will help with your mental health, your body staying healthy and it's fun.

9. Stay Connected

This one I have found is really important for our children especially. The suicide, domestic violence, drug overdose and depression rate has gone through the roof since this pandemic has started. It is crucial for our mental health that we stay connected to family and friends in anyway you can. Maybe a weekly Zoom call with the grandparents, create a pod with friends that have the same beliefs, do wine or tea nights with friends on Zoom, reconnect with old friends and so on. Have fun make up fun things to do that maybe are socially distanced like sidewalk get together, go for walks or hikes with friends, have a virtual dinner date, meet and chat from your car get creative so you can stay connected and not feel isolated. 

Please if you are in a space of feeling unsafe or thinking of harming yourself please call the suicide hotline or domestic violence hotline. 

10. Get Good Sleep

Set a routine for yourself for sleep. In a time where it feels like the children and you don't have any structure this is great time to practice healthy sleeping habits. Try and go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time. Have a daily ritual you do in the morning, maybe a meditation or journal before the rest of the house is up. Sleep is one of the most important things we can do to stay grounded and in alignment. 

11. Do What Brings You Joy

Find things that bring you joy. Write down what makes you feel good and try and implement that in your daily life. Find ways to laugh, dance and celebrate what is good in your life. This will help you move through the stories and beliefs you may be holding onto that are not true and give you something good to look forward too. Watch a funny movie and laugh, have a dance party in your home, read your favorite book, do art or whatever it is for you. 

12. Do Your Trauma Work

This is the last thing I will invite you to look at. During this time I highly recommend doing your trauma work. This is a time of uncertainty and fear for many people and it can bring on trauma responses. In the E4 Trauma method I work closely with my clients to heal past traumas, reprogram their subconscious mind and take their power back in all areas of their life. Most of us hold trauma in our body and it's what is controlling our thoughts and belief system. As we know our thoughts create our reality so if you are in a constant loop of thoughts that are not serving you then your outside world is going to be chaos as well. So during this time make sure you are also doing your own inner work "The Work" to help you heal during this time so you can come out of this strange even stronger and with more clarity. If you think this is something that you would like to explore please set up a time with me to chat. 

With love and gratitude,

Nicolle 

 

 

 

 

 

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